We See Things as WE are

One of my favorite quotes is: “We don’t see things as they are. We see things as WE are.” I often use this quote in my presentations on leadership and purpose. I think it is one of those quotes we should always remember because things are not always as they seem to us.

Have you ever gotten an email from someone that instantly made you angry? Have you ever had a disagreement with someone about something? Do you have any communication issues with someone close to you or perhaps a work colleague? More often than not the issues you have are YOUR issues not someone else’s. When we are hurting we tend to allow things to hurt us more and we also hurt others. A simple email with a few sentences could set us off not because of what the person wrote, but because of the mood we are in and how we read it.

Let’s try something. Read the next sentence to yourself: I never said he took the money. There are so many different ways you could read that sentence. The way you read that sentence is up to you. It is your choice based on who you are right now. It could be “I” never said he took the money. Or I NEVER said he took the money. I never SAID he took the money. I never said HE took the money. I never said he TOOK the money. Or even I never said he took the MONEY…

It is important for us as leaders to understand that we see things as we are. We see the world through our own eyes. That means we are not always right. Our current mood may make us jaded. Our past experiences and conditioning could have an effect (positive or negative) on how we see things.

So what does this mean? I think it means we should try to take a step back sometimes. Maybe we can give people the benefit of the doubt. Go back and read the email that got you so mad and try to think about where the person was coming from or maybe even talk to them about it. Talking to someone is always better than an email. Sorry 21st Century but that is and always will be true.

Take a look in the mirror from time to time when you are having an issue with someone. Chances are you are a huge part of the problem. You cannot control other people. But you can control yourself. That is called personal responsibility. And guess what? You can influence people through your behavior. Actually I think if I am not mistaken that influence is called… Leadership. Try it sometime.

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Categories: Leadership, Personal Responsibility
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